it has been years since she has done this. madelyne closes her eyes, reaches into her core for the goblyn force inside of her. she can feel the human version of herself recede bit by bit; the horns growing from her forehead, the fangs becoming more prominent in her mouth, her legs becoming like hooves. hands forming claws.
she pushes deeper, further. reaches until she finds the entity she wanted, the one she hadn't invited into the human realm in years. carefully, she beckons it to the street, gives it the room to form. there are gasps and screams from bystanders; she does not care.
when it finally materializes on the street, madelyne opens her eyes.
in front of her is the goblin carriage, in all it's glory: a fiery, hellish red, a smile on it's side full of sharp teeth, eyes shining gold in the night. two, pitch black hellish steeds stamping at the bit in front of it, their heads tossing proudly for their demonic mistress.
the carriage isn't cool against her fingers; it's a veritable wave of heat against her hand.
madelyne can feel it pulsing beneath her fingers, can feel the infernal flame that powers it thrumming in tandem with her heart. yes, it must be her heart; after all, this carriage would have never been real if it hadn't been because of the demonic deal she had made all those years ago.
even in the panicked state they were all in, she has to press her forehead against it, shut her eyes to purr with it. there was comfort in this, surety in it all. there wasn't anything to be afraid of here, with this.
and she knew that she should feel otherwise. there was so much trauma here that she--that molly-- that they were experiencing over and over again in dreams. so much terror and anger and horror still wrapped in their mind, and so much of it was so hard to deal with most days.
and then... then there were moments like this, madelyne almost nuzzling against the hellish exterior of the carriage, her demonic horns curving against it. moments where that power she'd wanted filled her, where those moments of darkness came back to her in a way that felt desirous and heady. moments where she could look upon those memories, remembering the game she played, the terror on other's faces, the satisfaction she felt in exerting her will, no matter how dark, made her smile.
moments like these, even with the revelation of how horrific it had been, in the end, she understood that she didn't want these moments to leave her. these moments were apart of her, down to the soul she had sold, down to the power she had gotten with it. even though she loved nathaniel, even though she now cared for jean, madelyne pryor's heart was still, and would always, belong to darkness.
this reminded her that deep down, she wouldn't have changed things. even with the regret and trauma she held now, madelyne knew that if it all played out again, there was no moment she would do over, nothing she would have changed.
she was this, at her core. nothing would change that fundamental fact about her and nothing ever would. even if things improved, even if she had a better life, this darkness was apart of her, forever. and it was a welcome darkness.
the carriage breathes deeply with her.
her claws dig into it's side, and it purrs.
"my dear one," her voice comes out tinged with power, dark and guttural, "we have much to do tonight. your mistress requires your help to find someone dear to me. will you do it for me?"
the carriage laughs, and her mouth curves into a cruel, pleased smile.